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From today’s news headlines:

OMG KIDS TAKING MORE DRUGS. EVERYBODY IS ALARMED!!!

Let’s take a look at that a bit more closely, shall we? Here’s the text from the actual report:

Police recorded drug offences increased by six per cent compared with 2007/08, following an increase of 18 per cent between 2006/07 and 2007/08. Increases in recent years have been largely attributable to increases in the recording of possession of cannabis offences… In 2008/09 possession of cannabis increased by six per cent compared with 2007/08. This increase continues an upward trend in recent years, with possession of cannabis offences recorded by the police rising by 90 per cent since 2004/05. This rise has been largely associated with the increased use of powers to issue cannabis warnings.

and

The [British Crime Survey] is also used to monitor trends in drug use and the figures are published annually. The BCS shows that overall illicit drug use among 16 to 59 year olds decreased from 11.1 per cent in 1996 to 9.3 per cent in 2007/08 and it is now at its lowest level since the BCS started measurement. This decrease is mainly due to successive declines in use of cannabis since 2003/04… This suggests the increase seen in recent years in police recorded drug offences is likely to be due to increase in police activity rather than in drug use.

Just thought I should highlight that. Once again: usage hasn’t risen: police have just been reporting it more.

The Press Complaints Commission (whose Code of Practice Committee is headed by Paul Dacre), has kindly decided not to censure Jan Moir for her article in the Daily Mail (whose editor is, erm, whassisname? Paul something?).

Which is nice.

Full commentary, by the way, at the excellent Tabloid Watch.

The Supreme Leader plans to stop direct flights from Yemen to the UK. That’ll stop ‘em.

Trouble is, banning direct flights only really works if there are only two countries in existence.

CEO of IBM UK & Ireland, on winning the Stonewall top employer award:

“We have done much to re-evaluate and strengthen our LGB strategy as part of our overall commitment to diversity. We’ve looked more closely at the LGB network group – its value proposition and its life-cycle – to ensure that it continues to deliver value, both to the corporation and to its members.

“At IBM, we pride ourselves on delivering a working environment which reflects equality of opportunity and experience for all. Diversity constitutes our character, our identity and ultimately our success – it is in our DNA.”

No, I don’t have a fucking clue what it means either. Think I might email this to the Plain English Campaign as an early contender for their Golden Bull awards.

Stephen Green, leader of militant fuckwit religious extremists ‘Christian Voice’*:

“The Bible calls for the ultimate penalty for sodomy (Lev 20:13) and for rape (Deut 22:25), and our Lord upheld the death penalty when He called for the accusers of the woman caught in adultery to cast the first stone (John 8:7) – if, that is, they were not implicated in adultery themselves.

“The contrast between our politicians and those of Uganda could not be more stark. A Parliamentarian in Uganda is trying to protect his nation’s children. The House of Commons of the United Kingdom is trying to corrupt ours. Which country is the more civilised, I wonder, in the eyes of Almighty God?”

Well then, my dear boy, to bring out an old cliché: if you like it so much why don’t you go live there?

*not to be confused with militant fuckwit religious extremists the ‘Christian Institute’