That's fucking stupid

Archive for the ‘Daily Mail’ Category

Holy shitsticks! The polo neck wearing trendies from Facebook are going to see the Home Secretary today; although one assumes it will be some lowly minion in the “we don’t give a fuck about the governments of marginalised european countries” department rather than someone important from the bay area.

The meeting is so that Facebook can slap a little “fuck you” all over the faces of the idiots we still tolerate as our government. In other words they’ll explain why they haven’t added the ‘clickceop’ button to their site.

I expect the conversation will go something like this:

Facebook: Seriously, guys, apart from making some Daily Mail readers think you’re doing something about the paedophile menace don’t you think your stupid little button is a little fucking wanky?

Big Al: Mutter mutter paedophiles mutter mutter Ashleigh Hall mutter mutter Peter Chapman

Facebook: Why do you keep bringing things back to that case? Ashleigh Hall was unlucky. Stupid as well but mainly unlucky.

Big Al: Mutter mutter please add the button so we can save all the kiddies mutter waffle.

Facebook: Dude, are you a window licker? Ashleigh Hall was tricked into thinking she was talking to a young boy. Let’s not forget that shall we? She was 17 years old so not some innocent little six year old, she was a 17 year old porker who was searching online for some cock.

Big Al: Mutter mutter but if she had been able to click the button.

Facebook: You mean the button that just links to a wanky police website? Dude, you’re not getting it, SHE DIDN’T HAVE ANY REASON TO CLICK A BUTTON BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS TALKING TO A YOUNG LAD.

Big Al: But the button…

Facebook: Fuck you! You can spin this shit however you like but a crappy icon on our site linking to an even crappier site would not have done cock all. We have ‘report this’ links strewn all over our site to deal with offensive content and a dedicated team of people who are selected and employed by us, we’d rather not hand that quite important job over to some incompetent buffoons in some shitty self justifying quango.

Big Al: But MSN and Beebo and Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh My!

Facebook: Yeah and stickers and ponies and myspace dot com. Don’t mention MSN to me, I don’t give a fuck that MSN have your wanky button, Ashleigh Hall spoke to Peter Chapman on MSN and no shitty button helped there. Do you know why? BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T SUSPECT ANYTHING. IF SHE HAD SUSPECTED SOMETHING SHE WOULD HAVE USED OUR ‘REPORT THIS’ LINK. SHE WANTED TO MEET THE GUY BECAUSE SHE WAS A FAT LONELY 17 YEAR OLD WHO SPENT TOO MUCH TIME ON THE INTERNET TRYING TO FIND BOYS TO FUCK HER.

If you actually suspect your are talking to a paedo online then you can click here to go to the aforementioned wanky site or you can just not arrange to meet up with the person who is probably trying to rape/murder you.

EDIT: Found this great picture of the cock ferret that got murdered. Enjoy.

From today’s news headlines:

OMG KIDS TAKING MORE DRUGS. EVERYBODY IS ALARMED!!!

Let’s take a look at that a bit more closely, shall we? Here’s the text from the actual report:

Police recorded drug offences increased by six per cent compared with 2007/08, following an increase of 18 per cent between 2006/07 and 2007/08. Increases in recent years have been largely attributable to increases in the recording of possession of cannabis offences… In 2008/09 possession of cannabis increased by six per cent compared with 2007/08. This increase continues an upward trend in recent years, with possession of cannabis offences recorded by the police rising by 90 per cent since 2004/05. This rise has been largely associated with the increased use of powers to issue cannabis warnings.

and

The [British Crime Survey] is also used to monitor trends in drug use and the figures are published annually. The BCS shows that overall illicit drug use among 16 to 59 year olds decreased from 11.1 per cent in 1996 to 9.3 per cent in 2007/08 and it is now at its lowest level since the BCS started measurement. This decrease is mainly due to successive declines in use of cannabis since 2003/04… This suggests the increase seen in recent years in police recorded drug offences is likely to be due to increase in police activity rather than in drug use.

Just thought I should highlight that. Once again: usage hasn’t risen: police have just been reporting it more.

The Press Complaints Commission (whose Code of Practice Committee is headed by Paul Dacre), has kindly decided not to censure Jan Moir for her article in the Daily Mail (whose editor is, erm, whassisname? Paul something?).

Which is nice.

Full commentary, by the way, at the excellent Tabloid Watch.

It’s a little quiet on the news front today. Well, it is in some papers. It’s mainly quiet in the scaremonger press because the big news story of the day is something they don’t want to shout about. So this one’s for all the parents who still think that the MMR jab is linked to autism: Yes, you lot. People who say stuff like:

‘I feel the children are being used as political pawns – it has not been about protecting the children. It is about protecting MMR.

‘I firmly believe these doctors are going to be hung out to dry because they dared to question MMR.

‘Dr Wakefield and his colleagues are the only doctors who ever really listened to us. I fear now that no doctor will want to have anything to do with helping any child that is harmed by any vaccine in the future.’

She said that after Michael had the MMR jab when he was 14 months old he began ’screaming and making a high pitch screeching like a cat’.

She added: ‘He was like a wild animal he was in so much pain.’

Shut the fuck up already.

I’m not normally one for reading the Daily Mail but I will make an exception for Kelly Rose Bradford. First let’s get the full disclosure out of the way: I *like* Kelly Rose Bradford as much as it’s possible to like a person you’ve never met. I keep my relationship just on the healthy side of stalking with a casual interest in the adventures of her and ‘Boy’ on twitter and although I have never met her, and no doubt never will, she seems like the sort of person that I’d get on with OK in real life. I don’t always agree with what she’s written but then she writes for the Daily Mail so I’d have to take a good long look at myself if I did.

Her latest chunk of wisdom in ‘the Heil’ is a rather heart warming insight into the guilt felt by ordinary good parents trying to do the right thing by their kids while getting judgemental glares from the tofu eating, Prius driving tossmonkeys that have those awful kids who never do as they are told because they have ‘a free spirit’ and an ‘unoppressed personality’. The question of if it’s right to give your kids a little wallop is one that is a burden to many but in reality it can be answered with a very quick question: is it in the best interest of the child?

Many years ago while I was young and stupid I worked as a residential social worker in a privately run kids home in Herefordshire; I went their as a rather naive chap right out of Uni and came away from there with my eyes opened to the evils of the world. The kids there had been subjected to some truly terrible abuses and I remember after first reading a kid’s file I rang both my parents, neither fine examples of parenting, and thanked them for being an awful lot better than they could have been. We were sat down for several weeks before being released onto the shop floor so that we could have numerous workshops covering various situations so that we could learn where to draw the line if we ever had to make a judgement call. Within the social care system there is a fear of using any sort of physical restraint on a child in case you get branded a paedo or a child beater and lose your career along with it; this was something that the management of the center wanted to equip us to face up to. The overall message was ‘in the situation you are facing, ask yourself what’s best for the kid’.

My first real test of this was when I was escorting a 12 year old girl on a home visit. She had a history of making a bit of side cash in the employ of Walsall’s finest pimps and I had to make sure she spent a couple of hours with her mum under supervision before returning to Hereford. She did the visit and on the way back we stopped for fuel in a services; this was too good an opportunity for her to miss and she tried to do a runner. I had to instantly weigh up the risks to her (if I was too heavy handed) and to myself (if  member of the public saw me restraining a young girl who would no doubt be quite vocal and decided to ‘help out’) against the risk that the girl would no doubt place herself in if she escaped from our care and made it back to the streets of Brum.

I grabbed her, stuffed her back in the car and then waited while she calmed down. No harm was done although the things that came out of her mouth would make anyone blush.

At the other end of the scale we had another young girl, 14 years old, who was in care because she was awaiting trial for assaulting her dad. He was a slight man who had doted on her for her entire life and worked hard so that the family could live in an area where she could go to a nice middle class school. There she’d met a bunch of better off kids who were also spoilt by their parents but the difference was that their parents were a lot better paid. Our girl wanted to keep up with her friends in terms of material possessions and freedom to go out to pubs and clubs and when the cash for her aspired lifestyle was not available she had turned violent towards her parents who were too scared of the repercussions to do anything but take it on the chin. Finally at the end of their tether they had made a complaint to the police to have her arrested and she had been taken into care for their safety. It took a lot of time for her to realise that we weren’t going to bend to her will on every occasion, and were prepared to deflect her blows when she started punching and kicking. She spent many an hour being restrained from hurting herself or others during her numerous hissy fits that lasted for hours but finally she fell into the structure and routine that the other kids enjoyed. When I took her on a home visit her parents were amazed that she had turned into a really pleasant girl who lived within a set of fair and reasonable boundaries.

The application of the ‘is it in the best interest of the child’ can flow into any area of parenting. Is it better to keep a kid happy by letting it have a happy meal or is it better to force them to eat sprouts. With a considerable amount of obesity in the UK I would judge that it’s in the interest of the child to force them to eat their greens every now and again or deprive them that extra helping of chips they crave. The problem is that this is all stuff you can’t legislate for, no matter how much Labour want to control every aspect of our lives. Back in the childrens’ home I was witness to a colleague who restrained a child more to exercise his own dominance and control rather than because it would be of any benefit to the child. In this case a colleague of his made an complaint and he was disciplined for it.  Making a hard and fast rule of ‘no restraining kids’ would have meant that a young girl would have ended up spending a few weeks renting her body to middle aged men but would have saved a young lad from an angry colleague getting all ‘PE Teacher’ on him.

So back to Kelly and her son, William. In both the cases she mentioned her utter shock and horror at smacking her own child which suggests she did not do it for personal pleasure or gain and in both cases it achieved a goal which was ultimately beneficial to the lad. In the comments section there are numerous comments from people either stating that smacking is fine and the PC left should STFU or there are those calling all smacking barbaric and wrong; quiet is the voice of reason and common sense.

So here’s my advice, the advice of someone who’s spent a lot of time rearing kids: don’t think about what you’re doing and if it’s right, think about why your doing it. If you are smacking a kid because a short sharp shock will instil a sense of discipline in the kid or stop them from doing something that is harmful then go for it. If you are smacking the kid because it makes you feel more in control, more able to deal with the lot that life had dealt you or makes you feel more powerful then maybe you need to think about if raising kids is something you’re emotionally ready for.

Smacking may not be something you want to do with your kids but make sure they learn where the boundaries are, a kid that is not prepared for life is far more abused by that neglect than a kid who is smacked occasionally for the right reasons. If you choose not to smack your kids then don’t judge those who do, judge why they are smacking their kids and ask if it’s in the best interest of the kid that they not turn out a spoilt brat.